Even the Lessons are Bigger in Texas

 

They say that everything is bigger in Texas, and in many unexpected ways I put that to the test as I traveled to the Dallas-Fort Worth area to cross state 14 off my list. This time around I had the extra treat of reuniting with a close friend from college and meeting her daughter; we hadn't seen each other since she was pregnant and it was such a treat getting to meet her spunky little one! It was such a blessing being able to stay with her and reconnect. As I get older I have come to realize how special it is to have people in all corners of the country that I get to love, and who I know love me right back. 

I was thankful for the fun, because there were a lot of twists to this trip that threw me for a loop which could have tanked the mood of the excursion. For starters, one of the two build days I had arranged was cancelled due to a lack of staffing over the Memorial Day weekend. I found out less than a week from my trip, which was a bit of a bummer. I was determined to make this trip happen though, and I packed my building clothes and hopped on a plane out to the Lone Star State. 

Mark showing us the ropes

Unbeknownst to me, my trip was about to coincide with an onslaught of severe storms that plagued our area for the entire week. The day after I arrived, a tornado touched down thirty miles away that killed seven people. A few days later, I woke up at 5am to the sound of high winds whistling through a crack in the bedroom window. Upon looking outside I saw trees swaying almost sideways, straining against straight line winds and rain that was assaulting my friend's house. I took that as a sign to wake my friend up and we wound up hiding out in her bathroom for about a half hour until the winds died down to a safer level. The rain lasted until almost 11am, and once we emerged to run some errands we saw the damage of the storm. In every neighborhood there were several trees and fences down, and in one neighborhood a local restaurant had their outdoor dining area completely collapse. I was thankful that no one was harmed, and by the afternoon the heat had ramped back up to the scorching 90-100 degree range and we all but forgot about the torrential downpour that had happened a few short hours before.

One positive to the string of storms was that it provided one reasonable day at the end of my trip, which just so happened to be the day I got to see what Habitat for Humanity was like out in Fort Worth, TX. I rode up in style in a Lyft-a first for me, but hey you do what you have to do to make things happen. It was immediately apparent that this Habitat chapter was a well-run operation. Their equipment was neatly organized in a storage trailer off to the side of the build site, and the first few minutes of the day included a thorough safety brief. This is supposed to be a standard part of every build, but I give this chapter top marks for making sure everyone was on the same page so we had a fun and safe day.

After our brief we slapped pieces of tape with our names written on them across our hard hats, and we were divvied up into small groups. I was placed with three others in a group supervised by Mark, a volunteer who told me that he had worked in the DC area with the government for about 20 years. Small world! Our task of the day was to finish installing siding on two homes-thankfully my group was in charge of the only shaded side of the structures because this girl does NOT do well in the heat. Mark gave us a quick tutorial and we got right to work.

Prepping for the next piece

In order to install siding, we first needed to measure the length of the James Hardy board to fit the length of the house. When a piece is installed, two hooks were pushed into the space between the two boards installed below the one we were working on. When we moved the newly measured board into position, we would slide it down into the two hooks, which would position the board so that the bottom of the new board was about 1.5-2 inches below the top of the previously placed board. That should leave precisely 7 inches between the bottom of the previous board and the bottom of the new one. This creates the layered look that you traditionally see with siding.

After placing the boards, it was imperative to recheck measurements to ensure the spacing remained consistent. Once this was confirmed, we would nail the siding down, making sure to place the nails about one inch down from the top of the board (so they would be covered by the next board) and the nails needed to be driven into the studs. Then we would wash, rinse, and repeat with other boards. While two of us took turns placing the siding on the house, the rest of us would work with Mark to measure out and cut the next piece of siding. I had the most fun using the cutting tool-though it was a little tricky and a lot of pressure to make sure we kept the tool level so we didn’t mess up the cuts. On a build site, especially with groups like Habitat, it’s important to not waste materials because they don’t come cheap!

Each of us took turns hydrating with Gatorade and standing in the shadow of the house to stay out of the Texas heat. Lunch was a welcome relief, and we ate a delicious meal donated by a local church while hanging out in the shade of the garage.

The goal of the day was to finish the siding so they could put the finishing exterior touches on a few days later, which was the last scheduled build day for this site. Though work slowed after lunch as the sun continued to beat down on us, we were able to get to a good finishing spot.

This chapter only completes the main structure and exterior of the homes, and then they contract out the rest. Other chapters will contract out more specialized work like electric and plumbing work, and let volunteers help with drywall, tiling, painting, etc. to get the interior ready for move-in. Additionally, I was informed that the build days are cut short in the summer due to the heat. Though I bet it makes it more difficult to stay on track with the work schedule, I was glad to see the chapter looked out for their people and wouldn’t push the limits with the high temps.

Cutting siding

You may think that this is the part where I wrap up and say it was a glorious time. I was soon going to find out that the excitement of the trip was just about to begin. I arrived at DFW airport two hours prior to my flight home taking off, as is pretty standard for those flying. Everything seemed to be going smoothly, I got through TSA precheck quickly and sat down with a bit of breakfast. Suddenly, I got a ping on my phone from the airline app saying my gate had been changed. Several minutes later, it was changed to a different terminal. A bit annoyed but still feeling relaxed, I hopped on a tram and got to the new gate. After about an hour, I was informed my flight was delayed. It had been raining all morning, so I wasn’t overly surprised. But then things began taking a turn for the worst. My flight was eventually cancelled, and it was a scramble to try to rebook.

Little did I know that over the next 24 hours I would experience a total of five cancelled flights and at least twenty gate and terminal changes. The last ditch effort flight many of us had to the DC area that evening was finally cancelled at 2am, after we acquired a plane but the crew had timed out and another storm began rolling in. I miraculously got rebooked on a flight set to go out at 7am. I spent an hour or two fitfully sleeping on and off on an airport bench alongside someone I had met along the way, until I got another dreaded ping: “Flight Cancelled”. I stood in line to get help rebooking for almost an hour, while also on hold with American Airlines, until the gate agents up and walked away. This was the final straw for me, and I slumped down to the floor of the airport trying to hold back tears. I felt trapped, and in a perpetual cycle of booking and cancelling flights that would never actually go out.

It was at this point that I made the decision to cut bait and make a 24 hour drive in a rental car from Dallas to Virginia. Every few hours I pulled over to take power naps in gas station or store parking lots and load up on snacks to keep me awake. I finally made it to Virginia in one piece, but I hadn’t seen my luggage in days and was in desperate need of a shower and to brush my teeth. I had a friend pick me up from the airport and he remarked I smelled like french fries. He was right; at some point over the course of three days I had indeed had McDonalds, but at this point I was too exhausted to care.

Getting back into the swing of things

Needless to say, this trip was full of lessons. First, a lesson in humility. Soon after receiving instructions about our build task, Mark went over each tool we’d use. He held a hammer out in front of us, and said over the years he has had to give more lessons on how to properly use that than for any other tool. In my head, I thought that seemed a bit silly. But God quickly humbled me as I got to work and struggled putting nails in straight through the studs. Those that know me are well aware that my hand-eye coordination is decent, but by no means noteworthy. Unfortunately for me, that day I couldn’t line things up for the life of me and I became quickly frustrated as I slowed things down, hitting my fingers and bending nails along the way. You may guess where this is going, but guess who got the dreaded hammer lesson that day? Yup, it’s me (hi, I’m the problem it’s me, as the beloved Taylor Swift would say).

Mark offered me a set of pliers, and gave me the advice to hold the nail between the pliers and then hammer the nail in. This would allow me to hit more firmly without fear of hitting my fingers. I slowed down and tried to focus on making solid hits in the center of the nail, so I wouldn’t keep bending them. In the moment, I felt flustered and frustrated. I didn’t want everyone thinking I was useless, especially since I had had more build experience than the other group members. But I chose to take the high road, recognizing that any effort is moving the needle forward on the project, and I was doing something that doesn’t naturally come easy for me. As I balanced at the top of the ladder I took a breath, checked my attitude, and got back to work. Though it was an embarrassing part of the day, it helped me appreciate that there is always room for growth and that the day was not about me, but about the work we get to do to help others.

Final touches

I was also reminded about the need to be adaptable in order to handle change effectively. Most of my trip was not what I anticipated it would be. From the change in build days, altering plans due to extreme heat and storms, and of course the mess at the airport had me pivoting again and again. I, like most people, am a creature of habit. I appreciate the consistency of routines, and feel less anxious when I have control of my plans. Inevitably, life will throw curve balls that I have learned to take on. In the moment, it can feel chaotic and a bit stressful. But I have become better at embracing new things and taking life one step at a time. There’s a saying which says when we plan, God laughs. I think He laughs at me a lot for thinking I could possibly have control of every aspect of my life. I often pray for patience, because it is something I naturally just do not possess. But instead of changing the circumstance, I’ve seen God changing my ability to handle what life hands me, and that is what has taught me patience and resilience.

My crew

Perhaps most importantly, it became evident to me that sometimes life seems to go awry, but it is in those moments that God can use us the most. For the almost 24 hour period I was trapped at the airport, I met many people who were simply trying to get to where they wanted to go like I was. For some like me, we wanted to go home. For others, they were trying to make it to their child’s weddings or to a connecting flight overseas. Whatever the case, enduring the same struggle brought a group of complete strangers together. I did my best to check in on others around me, and by the end of the evening we became a hodge podge family. I did my best to make sure no one was left behind to fend for themselves. I explained to one woman what it meant to be on standby, as she waited to board a connecting flight on her journey to Qatar to see family. I gave a mother and daughter updates on status of the flight we were tracking, because the daughter had her medication in her luggage and she was becoming upset because she needed it. Another man sitting near to them thanked me for simply being kind, saying he had watched me help others for hours. A few others had run into me several times over the course of the day and helped me find a place to sit down after scrambling between gates left me completely exhausted at 1:30am. Yet another person stayed with me into the night, as we tried to fitfully sleep on chairs by one of the gates.

Learning, growing, 
loving every minute

Each of these small moments gave me an extra push to keep going. After awhile it struck me that my current circumstances did not negate the connections I could make with all of those people. I took a minute to pray for each person I met, and thanked God for putting me in the paths of each passenger so I could show them even a glimpse of His light. Was that ordeal enjoyable? Of course not. But I’d like to think that each of those connections was intentionally put in motion by God, so people had a bit of hope in the middle of a stressful and chaotic environment. This last leg of my trip taught me yet again to look outside of my own experience to get a wider perspective. I was reminded to find silver linings and to use little moments to make a difference. The small things add up, and I think more than ever we can use reminders that we can always make a difference, even if it’s just for one person, one minute at a time.

Wow, holy long post. If you’ve stuck around this long, thank you for reading and tracking my progress on this journey. I can tell this has all started to shift my heart posture to focus on the bigger picture, and I have loved each memory that has gotten me here. Can’t wait to see what’s next, and hope you’re excited to see where this goes too!